12. Manna issue 62 - Putting God First in College 大學以神為先
Judith Yu—San Diego, California, USA 美國加州聖地牙哥
After laboring for the first half of my senior year in high school
on seemingly endless college applications
while juggling several Advanced Placement and college classes
and then waiting anxiously for acceptance letters to arrive in the mailbox,
I was determined to choose the right college for the sake of my future.
在高中第一個前半年，
努力參與了看似無窮無盡的大學申請之後，
同時兼顧幾門先修課程和大學課程，
然後焦急的等待錄取通知書送達信箱，
為了我的未來，我決心選擇一所合適的大學。
This was the most important decision that I had faced in all seventeen years of my life.
I was expected to make my college decision by May 1, 2009.
這是我十七年來，所面臨最重要的決定。
我預計將在 2009 年 5 月 1 日，做出大學的決定。
THE BIG DECISION 重大決定
The day before my decision deadline, I faced a dilemma.
I had narrowed my choices down to the University of California, Los Angeles (UCLA)
or the University of California, San Diego (UCSD).
After I got home from school,
I spent the entire afternoon lying in bed, debating between the two.
在我做出決定期限的前一天，我面臨了兩難的情況。
我已將選擇的範圍縮小到加州大學洛杉磯分校 (UCLA)，
或是加州大學聖地牙哥分校 (UCSD)。
在我放學回家後，
我整個下午都躺在床上，在兩者之間爭論。
UCLA seemed like the more logical choice
because it was prestigious and top-notch in terms of sciences,
and I was planning to major in biochemistry in preparation for medical school.
Furthermore, my friends and family were all in support of me choosing this university.
I knew that going to UCLA would enable me to better prepare for graduate school
as well as my future career.
加州大學洛杉磯分校似乎是更合理的選擇，
因為在科學方面，它享有盛名而且很頂尖，
我本來打算主修生物化學，為進入醫學院做準備。
此外，我的朋友和家人都支持我選擇這所大學。
我知道，去加州大學洛杉磯分校能使我更好為研究所，
以及我未來的職業生涯做準備。
However, after visiting the San Diego House of Prayer that spring
when called in for an interview at the university,
I felt more inclined to go to UCSD.
Growing up in Baldwin Park Church,
I never had the chance to participate much in holy work.
Perhaps it was because the congregation was large
and there were so many people available to help,
or perhaps there were other reasons.
Either way, I was not able to serve God as much as I wanted to.
然而，那年春天去參觀聖地牙哥祈禱所之後，
當受到邀請去大學參加面試時，
我覺得比較想要去加州大學聖地牙哥分校。
在博恩教會長大，
我從來沒有機會，可以參與太多聖工。
或許是因為會眾很多，
而且有很多人可以提供幫助，
或許還有其他的原因。
不管怎樣，我都不能按照自己的意願去事奉神。
Seeing that the San Diego House of Prayer had such a small congregation and a deficit of workers,
I knew that I would be able to find some kind of holy work, however small, to do there.
If I went to UCLA, I would continue to attend my childhood church,
where I would not have as much opportunity to serve.
發現聖地牙哥祈禱所的會眾很少，而且工人短缺，
我知道，自已能夠在那裡找到某種聖工參與，無論有多小。
如果我去加州大學洛杉磯分校，我將繼續參加自已兒時的教會，
這裡我不會有很多服事的機會。
After pondering and praying about it for hours,
I still couldn’t come up with an answer.
經過幾個小時的思考和禱告之後，
我還是想不出結論。
So I decided that I would simply flip a coin.
If it landed heads up, I would go to UCLA.
If it landed tails up, I would go to UCSD.
I flipped.
When I looked, the coin had landed on top of my blanket, wedged in a crease.
It was neither heads nor tails.
I was back to square one.
所以我決定，簡單拋一枚硬幣。
如果是硬幣正面，我會去加州大學洛杉磯分校。
如果是硬幣反面，我會去加州大學聖地牙哥分校。
我丟了硬幣。
當我看的時候，硬幣落在了我的毯子上，卡在了摺痕裡。
它即不是正面也不是反面。
我又回到原點了。
Finally, there was a knock on my door, and my dad came in.
He sat down at the edge of my bed and told me just what I needed to hear.
He said to me,
“Make the choice you think God wants you to make,
and just do what you think is right.
Life always continues on, despite the choices people make.”
終於，有人敲門了，父親走進來。
他坐在我的床邊，告訴我，我想聽的話。
他對我說，
“做出你認為神希望你做出的選擇，
做出你認為對的事。
不管人做出怎樣的選擇，生活總會繼續的。”
I began to realize that, no matter what choices we make,
God’s love for us never disappears.
As long as our decisions reflect our own love for God,
He will surely provide.
Since I knew which choice I would have to make in order to better serve God,
I submitted my intent to register to UCSD with a peaceful heart.
我開始明白，無論我們做出什麼選擇，
神對我們的愛永遠不會消失。
只要我們的決定反映了自已對神的愛，
祂就一定會預備。
因為我知道，我必須做出什麼選擇，才能更好地事奉神，
我懷著一顆平靜的心，向 UCSD 加州大學聖地牙哥分校提交了註冊意向。
UNEXPECTED BLESSINGS 意外的祝福
That June, I graduated from high school,
and, after an exciting summer vacation abroad,
I braced myself for the transition from high school to college.
Truthfully, I was slightly nervous and intimidated
because I had no idea what to expect
—who my roommates would be,
what they would be like,
how I would plan my class schedule,
what independence would really be like.
There was so much that I had yet to experience.
那年六月，我高中畢業了，
在國外度過了一個令人興奮的暑假之後，
我為做好了從高中到大學的轉換。
說實話，我有點緊張又害怕，
因為我不知道會發生什麼事，
—我的室友會是誰呢，
他們會是什麼樣子呢，
我要如何規劃自已的課表呢，
真正的獨立會是什麼樣子呢。
我還有很多事情都還沒經歷過。
Immediately after arriving at San Diego,
however, everything just seemed to fall in place,
and I knew that I had made the right choice coming to this school.
It was God’s abundant blessing
that I was able to evade the inevitable loneliness of college life,
get involved with holy work,
and also keep up with my academics.
一抵達聖地牙哥之後，
然而，一切似乎都水到渠成，
我知道，自已做了正確的選擇來到這所學校。
這是神豐富的祝福，
我能夠逃脫，大學生活不可避免的孤獨，
參與聖工，
並且跟上自已的學業。
A Family in Christ 基督的家庭
The first blessing that God gave to me was the warmth of a family in Christ.
Even though I was away from home and on my own for the first time,
I never really had the chance to feel lonely.
神給我的第一個祝福，就是基督家庭的溫暖。
儘管我是第一次獨自離家，
我從來沒有真正有機會感到孤獨。
By the first week, I had already been invited by the brothers and sisters at the prayer house
to a welcome dinner for all the new students.
We sat around the dinner table and shared a delicious meal together.
I felt so at home.
到了第一週，我就已經受到祈禱所弟兄姊妹的邀請了，
為所有的新生所舉辦的歡迎晚宴。
我們圍坐在餐桌旁，一起享用了一頓美味的佳肴。
我感覺就像在家裡一樣。
Throughout the rest of the quarter,
I continued to fellowship with all the brothers and sisters.
Sometimes we would go down to the beach,
sometimes we would go out for dinner and dessert,
sometimes we would cook together,
and, every other Tuesday, we had campus fellowship.
在本季接下來的時間裡，
我繼續所有的弟兄姊妹團契。
有時候我們會去海灘，
有時候我們會出去吃晚餐和小點心，
有時候我們會一起做飯，
隔週的星期二，我們會進行校園團契活動。
Despite having roommates and suitemates who partied quite often,
I never felt tempted to join them
because I had my friends from church to spend time with.
I thank God that He gave me such a caring family in San Diego.
儘管有室友和舍友經常舉行派對，
我從來沒有想過要加入他們，
因為我有教會的朋友可以一起共度時光。
我感謝神，在聖地牙哥給了我一個如此充滿關懷的家庭。
Participating in Holy Work 參與聖工
The second blessing that God gave me was the blessing of holy work.
As I had imagined, I finally had the opportunity to participate in church work.
However, the opportunity that presented itself
was one that I had been both expecting and dreading.
神給我的第二個祝福，就是聖工的祝福。
正如我所想的那樣，我終於有機會可以參與教會工作了。
然而，機會本身所出現的，
這是我既期待又害怕的一件事。
San Diego House of Prayer lacked pianists.
Most people who know I was raised in a musical family
expect me
to be able to play the piano for church,
but this has never been the case.
I have always had trouble sight-reading,
and, whenever people sing along while I play,
even if it is just a few people that I am very familiar with,
I get extremely nervous and stop playing almost immediately.
聖地牙哥祈禱所缺少彈鋼琴的人。
大多數都知道，我是音樂世家長大的人，
都期待我能夠為教會彈鋼琴，
但是這樣的情況從來沒有出現過。
我一直有困難讀樂譜，
而且，當我演奏時人們跟著唱，
就算是只有幾個我很熟悉的人，
我會變得非常緊張，幾乎立刻就停止彈奏。
Even if I am not sight-reading music for the first time
and have practiced a hymn over and over again,
I still panic when others sing along.
The only time I am able to play smoothly is when I am alone.
Nevertheless, I practiced whenever I had the chance during lunch on Sabbaths
or after service on Friday nights,
all the while never having the confidence
that I would ever be able to actually play for hymn singing.
即使我不是第一次看樂譜，
而且已經練習讚美詩了一遍又一遍，
當別人跟著唱的時候，我仍然感到很恐慌。
我唯一能很流暢彈奏的時間，就是自已一個人的時候。
儘管如此，在安息日午餐時，有機會我就會練習，
或週五晚上聚會後，
一直以來，都沒有信心，
相信自已將能夠為詩頌來真正演奏讚美詩。
Toward the end of the quarter,
I was finally asked to play during a Friday night service.
Reflexively, I wanted to say no,
but then I reminded myself that this was the reason I came to San Diego in the first place.
I couldn’t let my lack of confidence get in the way of service for God.
I made up my mind and replied,
“I will try my best.”
到了季末時，
我終於被邀請在周五晚上的聚會期間彈奏。
我本能的想說不，
但後來我提醒自己，這就是我來到聖地牙哥的首要原因。
我不能讓自己因為沒有信心而妨礙了服事神。
我下定決心，並且回答：
“我會盡力。”
Before playing, I said a silent prayer,
and somehow everything turned out just fine.
I didn’t embarrass myself like I thought I would.
Granted, my playing was far from perfect,
but I successfully played for hymn singing that night.
Without God’s guidance, I could never have overcome my fear.
He enabled me to serve Him, and I was so grateful.
彈奏前我心中默禱，
不知何故，一切都很順利。
我並沒有像自已想像的那樣，會讓自己難堪。
當然，我的彈奏還沒有很完美，
但那天晚上我成功的彈奏了詩頌。
若沒有神的引導，我永遠無法克服自已的恐懼。
祂讓我能可以事奉他，而我則非常的感激。
Academics 學術
The final blessing that God bestowed on me was in academics.
Since the start of the quarter,
I had been struggling with chemistry.
Even though I read the textbook meticulously and thoroughly,
I felt like I would never understand it
and could never do more than a problem or two out of the ten-problem assignments.
神賜給我最後的祝福是學業。
自本季開始，
我一直在化學方面苦苦掙扎。
儘管我仔細、徹底的研讀了課本，
我覺得自已永遠沒有理解它，
並且永遠只能完成十個作業問題的一兩個問題。
In the academic quarter system, the weeks pass by swiftly,
and, before I knew it, it was time for final exams.
I became increasingly stressed as finals approached,
and it didn’t help that all three of my finals were on the exact same day.
I would have to sit through nine straight hours of examinations
from 8:30 in the morning to 6:00 at night.
在學季制中，一週週的時間過得很快，
不知不覺間，期末考就到了。
隨著期末考的臨近，我的壓力就越大，
而且我三場期末考都在同一天舉行，就無可避免了。
我就必須連續參加九個小時的考試
從早上 8:30 到晚上 6:00。
The night before my finals, I had given up studying for chemistry.
I was in despair.
Would I already have to give up on my plans for medical school?
期末考前一天晚上，我就已經放棄學習化學。
我很絕望。
我是否已經不得不放棄醫學院的計劃呢？
While I prayed before going to bed,
I simply told God that I had tried my best
and that I would put everything in His hands.
I also told Him that I didn’t want to disappoint my parents or make them worry.
當我在睡前禱告時，
我只是告訴神，自已已經盡力了，
我會把一切都交在祂的手裡。
我還告訴祂，我不想讓父母失望，或是讓他們擔心。
They had done so much for me to get me to where I was,
supporting all of my decisions,
pushing me to do several extracurricular activities,
staying up late with me on the nights
that I had particularly large amounts of work to do,
not to mention putting in a considerable amount of money and effort
to ensure that I would succeed in the future.
I wanted at the least to show them that I appreciated their efforts by doing well in school.
他們為我做了很多事，才讓我到達現在的位置，
支持我所有的決定，
督促我參加一些課外活動，
晚上陪我熬夜，
我有特別大量的工作要做，
更不用說，要投入大量的金錢和精力，
以確保我將來會成功。
我至少想向他們表明，我經由學校表現出色來感謝他們的努力。
Thanks to the grace of God, everything turned out well.
Despite having skipped an entire question on my chemistry final,
which only had ten questions,
my score was a sturdy thirty points above the class average.
The other two finals that I took also ended up just as well.
感謝神的恩典，一切都順利。
儘管在化學期末考中，我略過了整串問題，
雖只有十個問題，
我的成績比班級平均分數，穩穩的高出了三十分。
我參加的另外兩場期末考，也都取得了同樣的好成績。
GOD OPENED MY EYES 神打開雙眼
If I have learned anything besides academic knowledge after my first quarter in college,
it would be that God truly blesses those who have the heart to serve Him.
Furthermore, God will undoubtedly answer the prayers of those who have pure motivations.
如果說我在大學第一學期之後除了學術知識之外還學到了什麼的話，
神才會真正祝福那些有心事奉祂的人。
而且，神無疑會回應那些動機純正的人的禱告。
I am so thankful that I made the decision to attend UCSD
because God has opened my eyes
and helped me to grow spiritually in such a short period of time.
I realize that, as long as I put God first in my life,
everything else will fall into place.
All I have to do is seek earnestly for Him and trust in Him.
我非常感謝，我做出就讀加州大學聖地牙哥分校 UCSD 的決定，
因為神打開了我的眼睛，
並幫助我在如此短的時間內，可以靈性成長。
我意識到，只要我把神放在生命的首位，
其他的事情都會水到渠成。
我所要做的就是，迫切尋求祂，並且信靠祂。
Although at times we all face decisions
where we are tempted to rely on our own understanding
and take the road that furthers our worldly pursuits,
we need to realize that God is far more important than anything this world has to offer.
If we can put God first in our lives,
we can also be confident that God will bless us abundantly
not only with material blessings
but, more importantly, with spiritual blessings.
We can therefore receive twice the blessings if we set our sights on God.
儘管有時候，我們都會面臨決定，
而我們都傾向依賴自己的認知，
並走上進一步追求世俗的道路，
我們需要明白，神比這個世界所呈現的任何事物都更重要。
如果我們可以把神放在生命的第一位，
我們也可以有信心，神會大大祝福我們
不只是物質的祝福
但更重要的是，有屬靈的祝福。
因此，如果我們將目光投向神，我們就能得到雙倍的祝福。
小頁 markvmax@hotmail.com
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