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3. Manna issue 57 - Now My Eyes Have Seen God 如今親眼見神

I had no interest in religion, 
but that changed when I stepped into the True Jesus Church.

我以前對宗教沒有興趣，
但當我走進真耶穌教會之後，一切都改變了。

Olivier Djiann—Sung Shan, Taiwan 台灣松山

Life is full of unforeseen events. 
Born and educated in France, 
I never imagined that I would one day move to Taiwan 
and marry someone I met there. 
I thought even less of becoming a Christian 
and a member of the True Jesus Church.

人生充滿了不可預見的事件。
由於在法國出生並受教育，
從從未想過有一天我會搬去台灣，
並與在那裡遇到的某人結婚。
我更沒想過會成為一位基督徒，
並成為真耶穌教會的信徒。

TAKING THE FIRST STEP 走出第一步

My father is Jewish and my mother is Catholic, 
but they are both non-practicing. 
So when I was still a child, 
they decided that I could choose my own religion.
However, religious belief always remained distant for me, 
and I had no interest in it.

我父親是猶太人，母親是天主教徒，
但他們都沒有去實踐。
所以當我還是個小孩的時候，
他們就決定我可以選擇自己的宗教。
然而，宗教信仰對我來說一直都很遙遠，
而且我對此毫無興趣。

It was my wife who first believed and was baptized in True Jesus Church. 
She tried to bring me to the church 
but was unsuccessful because I felt that I did not need religion.

第一個信主的是我妻子，並在真耶穌教會受洗。
她曾試圖帶我去教會，
但並沒有成功，因為我覺得自己不需要宗教。

I thought that it was good that she was happy with the church, 
but I wanted her to leave me out of it. 
My wife therefore attended services at Sung Shan Church without me.

我認為她去教會很開心是件好事，
但我希望她放過我。
因此，我妻子去松山教會聚會，沒帶著我。

One Sabbath after the birth of our daughter, 
my wife needed my help to bring the stroller and other baby necessities to the church. 
I agreed to help her, but told her 
that I would only go to the door of the building; 
I wasn’t going to go inside.

我女兒出生後有一次安息日，
我妻子需要我幫忙把嬰兒車和其他嬰兒用品帶去教會。
我同意去幫她，但卻告訴她
我只會去到會堂門口；
我沒有想進到裡面。

But once we got to the door, 
I saw that she would not be able to manage everything alone, 
so I helped her bring the stroller up the stairs into the church.
I purposely stayed silent and didn’t speak to anyone. 
However, God touched me through my weak point: vision.

但一旦我們走到門口，
我看出她自已一個人無法處理所有的事情，
於是我幫她把嬰兒車提上樓梯，進了教會。
我故意保持沉默，並沒有與任何人說話。
然而，神透過我的軟弱感動我：異象。

I am a professional photographer, 
and I love to observe the world around me.
Once I was in the church, 
I could keep my mouth shut, indifferent to the words spoken around me, 
but I could not walk with my eyes closed. 
I was touched to see the happy faces of the brothers and sisters, 
which were so different from those of the outside world.

我是一位職業攝影師，
我很愛觀察自已周遭的世界。
一旦我進入教會，
我可以閉上嘴巴，對周圍的言行保持冷淡，
但我卻無法閉上眼睛走路。
我因為看到弟兄姐妹臉上的笑容很感動，
這與外面的世界的眾人截然不同。

I even saw a radiant face like that of an angel in a classical painting. 
I wondered,
“How can these people be so joyful when life is sometimes so painful?” I
didn’t believe in God that day, 
but a crack appeared in the wall that I had built around my heart.
God had weakened the wall through this experience in church,
and the crack would continue to widen in the following months.

我甚至看到了一張容光煥發的臉龐，就像古典繪畫的天使一樣。
我不禁想：
“當生活有時是如此痛苦時，這些人怎麼還能如此快樂？”
那天我並沒有信神，
但我築起的心靈之牆出現了一道裂縫。
神透過這次教會經歷，軟化了這堵牆，
而在接下來的幾個月裡，這條裂縫還會一直擴大。

THE KEY TO MY GROWTH 我成長的關鍵

Of all the True Jesus Church locations in Taiwan, 
Sung Shan probably has the greatest number of brothers and sisters
who speak French or have studied in France.

在所有台灣的真耶穌教會地點中，
松山教會大概是擁有最多弟兄姊妹的教會，
他們會說法語或曾在法國留學過。

I had the opportunity to meet a pastor
who had studied French in college, 
and we therefore organized a Bible study group in French at Sung Shan. 
I asked questions about the Bible, 
and the preacher was able to practice the language when answering my questions.

我曾有機會去認識了一位牧師，
他曾在大學學習法文，
因此我們在松山教會籌組了一個法文查經小組。
我詢問了關於聖經的問題，
而傳道在回答我問題時，也能夠練習法語。

But I still had a problem 
because I refused to kneel down and pray; 
I did not want feel like I was inferior to a master.

但我仍然有一個問題，
因為我拒絕跪下來禱告；
我不想覺得自己低於某個主人。

One evening, I went to service with my wife 
and stayed in the back of the chapel,
as I usually did, not participating very much in anything.

有一天晚上，我與妻子一起去聚會，
而且待在會堂的後面，
就像往常一樣，並沒有參與太多任何事情。

I watched from my seat 
as the brothers and sisters knelt down to pray at the end of the service. 
Suddenly, God spoke to me for the first time. 
He said, “You can spend your whole life sitting in the back of the chapel.” 
In other words, one day I would have to take the first step toward building my faith.

從座位上我看出去，
那時弟兄姐妹在聚會結束時跪下來禱告。
突然，神第一次對我說話。
祂說：“你可以一輩子坐在會堂後面。”
換句話說，總有一天，我必須要踏出建立自已信仰的第一步。

From that moment on, I started to reflect on my situation. 
I asked myself,
“Why did God take a Parisian to Taiwan 
to live ten minutes from the true church?
If I had stayed in France, 
I would never have had the chance to meet or know God.”

從那一刻起，我開始反省自己的情況。
我問自己：
“為什麼神要帶一個巴黎人到台灣，
去住在離真教會十分鐘路程的地方？
如果我留在法國，
我就永遠沒有機會遇見神，認識神。 ”

It was then that I started to pray,
although without much conviction. 
A few weeks later, 
I decided that I was going to go to the front of the chapel to pray.
During that prayer, I felt a breeze through my hair, 
and I was very joyful and wanted to laugh. 
But mostly I felt that I was at home.

從那時起，我開始禱告，
儘管並沒有很堅定的信心。
幾週之後，
我決定自已要去教會前面禱告。
禱告的時候，我感覺有一陣微風拂過我的頭髮，
而我感到很喜樂，很想笑。
但最主要的是我覺覺自已就像在家一樣。

I realized that God wasn’t a stranger,as I had believed, 
but that He was like a friend whom I hadn’t seen for a long time 
because I never invited him over, 
even though he lives nearby. 
I also had this impression, 
that our life is like a train that
passes through many stations, 
and the problem is that we do not know at which station it will stop.

我意識，神並非就如我所想像的那樣像是陌生人，
而祂更像是一位我許久未見的朋友，
因為我從未邀請他來家裡作客，
儘管他住在附近。
我還有一種感覺，
我們的人生就像一列火車，
會經過許多車站，
而問題是我們不知道火車會停在哪一站。

That evening I had the conviction
that the True Jesus Church was the station where I had to stop at, 
and, most important of all, 
I knew that I had to persevere in prayer. 
Prayer was the key to my growth.

那天晚上，我終於確信，
真耶穌教會是我必須停靠的車站，
而且，最重要的是，
我知道自已必須堅持不懈的禱告。
禱告是我成長的關鍵。

THE DOOR TO UNDERSTANDING 領悟之門

One evening, when I was at home, 
I heard God speak to me. 
He said, “Now you need to think about baptism.” 
And that was all He said. 
So the next day I went to church and told the brothers and sisters
that I wanted to receive baptism. 
They were happy for me and congratulated me, 
but one sister asked me a very good question: “Why?”

有一天晚上，我在家的時候，
我聽到神對我說話。
祂說：“現在你需要考慮接受洗禮。”
而那就是祂所說的全部話語。
於是隔天我去了教會，告訴弟兄姐妹，
我想要接受洗禮。
他們為我感到高興，並向我祝賀，
但一位姐妹問我一個非常好的問題：“為什麼？”

I was surprised by the question 
because I simply wanted to be baptized. 
I had an urge to get baptized, 
and that was my reason; 
I had no logical explanation. 
On the other hand, 
the question was reasonable 
because baptism is an important sacrament that should not be taken lightly. 
I felt a bit upset when I went home 
because I was bothered by that question.

我對這個問題感到驚訝，
因為我只想要受洗。
我有一種衝動想受洗，
而那就是我的理由；
我沒有合理的解釋。
另一方面，
這個問題也很合理，
因為洗禮是很重要的聖禮，不應受輕視。
當我回家時，自已感到有點難過，
因為這個問題讓我很困擾。

That night God gave me a very clear answer to the sister’s question. 
While I was asleep, God told me in a dream, 
“Be baptized. 
Baptism is the door, 
and when you pass through it you will understand everything.”

那天晚上，神給了我一個非常清楚的答案，來回答了那位姐妹的問題。
當我睡著的時候，神在夢中告訴我：
“去受洗吧。
洗禮是大門，
當你走進它，你就會明白一切。 ”

I decided to receive baptism a few months later at the October 2003 spiritual convocation. 
During the convocation, I again went up to the front to pray. 
I had another strong impression, 
as interesting as the one from my first time praying in the front, 
but not as peaceful. 
I felt like I was surrounded by heavy fog 
and was struggling hard to approach a dim light far away. 
It was difficult to bear the darkness, and I wanted to get out.

我決定幾個月後，在 2003 年 10 月的靈恩會接受洗禮。
靈恩會期間，我再次走到前面禱告。
我又有了強烈的感受，
正我的第一次去前面禱告一樣有趣，
但沒有那麼平靜。
我感覺自己被濃霧包圍，
很努力想要靠近遠處一絲微弱的亮光。
要忍受黑暗是很困難的，我渴望脫離。

After the prayer ended, 
the preacher told me I had received the Holy Spirit. 
At first I was very surprised and I told myself,
“So this is how one receives the Holy Spirit.” 
I was quite disappointed, 
because everything I had heard from others about receiving the Holy Spirit
was very positive and very joyful. 
But I came to understand
that this was only the beginning of my experiences with the Holy Spirit.

禱告結束後，
傳道告訴我，我已經得到聖靈了。
起初我非常驚訝，自已心想：
“原來這是個人得到聖靈的方式。”
我很失望，
因為我之前從別人那裡所聽到關於得到聖靈，
都是非常正面，非常喜樂。
但我逐漸明白，，
這只是我體驗聖靈的開始。

WELCOMED BY GOD 歡迎神

Two days after my baptism, I told myself,
“Now that you are a newly baptized person you need to form good habits.” 
So I decided to start praying every morning before starting work. 
After the prayer, I turned on my computer 
and I saw a vision
—it was like having a dream, but I was not asleep. 
I was in my house in Taipei,
and someone rang the doorbell. 
I opened the door and saw a Caucasian man about forty years old standing in front of me. 
He asked me if he could enter my house.

受洗兩天後，我告訴自己：
“現在既然你是一位新受洗的人，就要養成良好的習慣。”
於是，我決定每天早上上班前禱告。
禱告結束後，我打開電腦，
然後我看見一個異象，
—就像做夢一樣，但我並沒有睡著。
我在台北自已的家裡，
有人按了門鈴。
我打開門，看到一個大約四十歲白人男子站在我面前。
他問我是否他可以進屋。

I let him in, 
and even though I had never met him before, 
I knew that he was my paternal grandfather. 
Although he had passed away before I was born, 
I recognized him from the photographs of him in my father’s office.

我讓他進來，
即使我以前從未見過他，
但我知道他是我爺爺。
雖然他已在我出生前就過世了，
但我還是從父親辦公室的的照片上認出了他。

After we talked for a while, 
he told me that he had to leave. 
I asked him, “Can I give you a hug?” 
He said, “Of course, my son.” 
I began to cry, and I saw myself shrinking in height as he became very tall.
He held me in his arms, and I felt peace and immense joy.

我們聊天一會兒之後，
他告訴我他要離開了。
我問他：“我可以抱抱你嗎？”
他說：“當然可以，我的兒子。”
我開始哭泣，我看到自己變得越來越矮，而他卻變得越來越高。
祂抱我在自已的懷裡，我覺得很平安和有極大的喜悅。

For me, God is like my grandfather
— very loving and very protective. 
He welcomed me not only as a child but also as a lost sheep.

對我而言，神就像我的祖父，
—很慈愛，呵護備至。
祂不只像接納小孩一樣接納我，也像接納一隻迷羊一樣接納我。

Since my baptism in the True Jesus Church, 
I feel like I have experienced this verse from Job 42:5, 
“My ears had heard of you but now my eyes have seen you” (NIV).

自從我在真耶穌教會受洗，
我感覺自己彷彿體驗到約伯記 42 章 5 節的這節經文：
“5我從前風聞有你，現在親眼看見你。”(NIV)。

I wish and hope 
that everyone can see God with their own eyes and feel Him.
Knowing God and drawing closer to Him 
is the most beautiful adventure a human being can have. 
I can see how my life is now more peaceful and bright. 
May all glory and thanks be unto God.

我期盼
大家都能親眼看見神，體驗到祂。
認識神並親近祂，
是一個人所能經歷最美麗的冒險。
我看到自已的生活現在變得更平安又明亮。
願一切榮耀感謝歸給神。

小頁 markvmax@hotmail.com
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