3. Manna issue 61 - From Idols to Salvation 從偶像到得救
Searching for Jesus after worshipping idols fails to bring relief.
崇拜偶像無法減輕痛苦之後，尋找耶穌
Brian Lim—Singapore 新加坡
A DEVOUT IDOL WORSHIPPER 虔誠的偶像崇拜者
I am by nature very introspective and religious.
At the tender age of ten,
I was already asking such questions:
Is there a God?
How many deities are there in heaven?
Where will I go after I die?
我本身是非常會自我審察和虔誠的。
年紀十歲稚嫩的時候，
我已經開始問這樣的問題了：
有神嗎？
天上有多少神仙呢？
我死後會去哪裡呢？
My family was Taoist and worshipped the Goddess of Mercy.
I liked going with my parents
and especially my grandmother to Chinese temples for worship rituals.
我家信奉道教，崇拜觀世音菩薩。
我喜歡和父母一起去，
尤其是我祖母會到中國廟進行膜拜儀式。
We would gather with other worshippers
and chant for half an hour or more and listen to sermons from a monk.
Although I didn’t understand most of what the monk said,
I never grumbled about the long hours there.
我們會與其他崇拜者聚集，
念經半小時或更長時間，並且聆聽僧人說法。
雖然我聽不懂大部分和尚說的內容，
我從來沒有抱怨過待在那裡的時間太長。
Back home, I chanted three times a day
and offered incense to the ancestral shrines and idols in the house.
I was a staunch believer in ancestor worship even at that young age.
回到家，我一天會唸經三次，
並向屋內的祖先祠堂和神像上香。
即使在很小的時候，我就是堅定祖先崇拜的信徒。
My first and indirect brush with Christianity came when I was twelve,
and it literally ended in flames.
I found out that
one of my brothers had joined a very active Christian group at his college.
Christian tracts were often sent to him at home,
and he had to be cautious
as my father was extremely anti-Christian.
I also knew where my brother hid those publications.
我第一次間接接觸基督教是在十二歲的時候，
它確實以火焰燒掉而結束。
我發現，
我一個兄弟在他的大學，加入了一個非常活躍的基督教團體。
基督教小冊子常寄給他到家裡，
他必須很小心，
因為我父親極度反對基督教。
我也知道兄弟把這些出版品藏在哪裡。
My father eventually discovered that
my brother was part of this Christian group
and lectured and nagged him daily.
Seeing my father so angry and wanting to please him,
I told him where the tracts were hidden.
When my brother was out of the house,
we dug them out and burned them.
I was glad that I had pleased my father
by helping him get rid of these Christian tracts.
我父親最終發現了，
我哥哥是這個基督教團體的成員，
每天教訓他，責怪他。
看到父親如此生氣，為了想要討好他，
我告訴他小冊子藏在哪裡。
那時我哥哥不在家，
我們把它們挖出來然後燒掉。
我很高興自已取悅了父親，
幫他丟掉這些基督教的小冊子。
About two years later,
I had two classmates and an English teacher who were Christians.
Once in a while, these classmates would talk to me about Christ,
but it did not leave any impression on me.
大約兩年後，
我有兩個同學和一位英文老師都是基督徒。
每隔一段時間，這些同學會向我談論基督，
但這樣並沒有給我留下任何印象。
I had been told from a young age that
all religions were the same since they all taught man to do good.
Moreover, I had also been taught
that Christianity was a foreign religion
and we Chinese should stick to the traditional religions,
namely Taoism or Buddhism, handed down from our ancestors.
小的時候，我就被告知，
一切的宗教都是一樣的，因為它們都會教導人類行善。
此外，我還被教導，
基督教是外來的宗教，
我們中國人應該堅守傳統信仰，
就是道教或佛教，是我們祖先流傳下來的。
One time, a Christian classmate shocked me when he said that
Christians are smarter than Taoists
because Taoists are silly enough to offer food to blocks of wood.
I knew that he was serious because his family had converted to Christianity.
I was so offended by his remark that
I stopped listening from then on whenever Jesus was mentioned.
有一次一位基督徒同學令我震驚這樣說，
基督徒比道教徒聰明，
因為道教徒很傻去給木頭獻供物。
我知道他是認真的，因為他家已經改信了基督教。
我對他的言論感到非常的生氣，
從那時起，每當提到耶穌時，我就停止聆聽了。
TRYING CHRISTIAN PRAYER 嘗試基督教祈禱
That same year, when I was fourteen,
my father’s health deteriorated very quickly
and he was diagnosed with liver cancer.
By year’s end, the pain was so great
that he would toss and turn with each spasm.
The sight of him in such agony broke my heart.
同年，我十四歲的時候，
我父親的健康惡化的很快，
他被診斷出得到肝癌。
到了年底，因為覺得很痛，
以至於每次抽搐他都會翻來翻去。
看到他如此的痛苦，我會很傷心。
Whenever my father was in pain,
I would beg the deities I worshipped to have mercy and to heal him.
Oftentimes, I would plead for them
to give him a moment of peace
and be relieved of the pain so he could sleep well.
I even hit my head against the floor as I begged.
But none of my requests were granted.
每當父親很痛時，
我祈求自已跪拜的神明發憐憫來醫治他。
大部份的時候，我會求他們憐憫，
能給他片刻的平靜，
可以減輕疼痛，這樣他才可以好好睡覺。
當我乞求時，我甚至用頭去撞地板。
但我的請求都沒有得到回應。
One night, while my father was in the throes of pain,
my Christian classmate called me.
When I told her that my father was in great pain,
she suggested that I pray to Jesus.
The moment I heard “Jesus,” I hung up on her.
She called back and I hung up when she brought up Jesus again.
When she called a third time, I gave in.
有一天晚上，當我父親正在陣痛苦時，
我的基督徒同學打電話給我。
當我告訴她我父親很痛苦的時候，
她建議我向耶穌禱告。
當我聽到“耶穌”的時候，就掛斷了她的電話。
她又打電話回來，當她又提到耶穌的時候我就掛了電話。
當她第三次打電話的時候，我就屈服了。
Since my usual deities had not listened to me,
I decided that there was no harm in trying this foreign God.
So I asked her to teach me how to pray.
She said, “It’s very simple.
Start with ‘In Jesus’ name I pray,’
and just say whatever you want to say.
That’s all.”
Indeed, it seemed simple
—no idol was needed, and I could pray anywhere.
由於我平時的神明沒有垂聽我，
我就決定，去試試這位外國神明並沒有什麼壞處。
所以我請她教我如何禱告。
她說：“這很簡單。
一開始說‘奉耶穌的聖名禱告’，
然後只要說出你想說的話。
就只有這樣。”
確實，看起來很簡單
—不需要有偶像，任何地方我都可以禱告。
After hanging up the phone, I went into my room.
I prayed and begged with a sincere heart
that Jesus relieve my father of his pain.
During the prayer, I felt a great sense of peace
that I had never experienced before,
certainly not while chanting or praying to idols.
掛斷電話後，我就進了自己的房間。
我就誠心禱告祈求，
耶穌減輕了我父親的痛苦。
祈禱的時候，我感到了極大的平安，
是我以前從沒有體驗過的，
當然不是那種在向偶像念經或祈求的情況。
After the prayer,
I went to my father’s room to check on him.
He was no longer in pain and was fast asleep!
Exhilarated,
I told myself that there must be something special about Jesus.
My request had been granted after only one prayer to Him
while my repeated requests to the idols had been ignored.
禱告結束後，
我走去父親的房間去看看他的狀況。
他不再感到痛苦，就很快睡著了！
非常興奮之下，
我告訴自己耶穌一定有什麼特殊之地方。
我只是向祂請求一次，禱告後就實現了，
而我重覆向偶像提出的請求卻沒有回應。
I decided not to offer incense or chant to any deities anymore.
I wanted to learn more about Jesus.
我決定不再向任何神明上香或或誦經。
我想多了解耶穌。
MY SEARCH FOR JESUS 我尋找耶穌
Back in school,
I began to discuss Christianity with my two Christian classmates
and asked them questions about the religion.
When I did that, many of my Muslim classmates,
who had never talked to me about Islam before,
also came to talk to me about the Quran.
回到學校後，
我開始和兩位基督徒同學討論基督教，
問他們有關宗教的問題。
當我這樣做的時候，我很多回教的同學，
他們以前從來沒有和我談過回教，
也來跟我談論《古蘭經》。
My new faith in Jesus was soon shaken
by my interaction with my Muslim friends.
There were times when they were so persuasive
that I was tempted to join their religious classes
and have their teacher explain the teachings of Islam to me.
But I never went.
我新的耶穌信仰很快就動搖了，
因為我與回教朋友的互動。
有很多次他們讓人很相信，
我就動心想去加入他們的宗教課程，
並讓他們的老師向我解釋回教的教義。
但我從來沒有過去。
Instead, I turned to my Christian English teacher to clear my doubts.
However, her answers could not completely reassure me
and restore my faith in Christianity.
I was left with many questions and no answers.
相反，我轉向求助自已的基督教英語老師以消除自已的疑慮。
然而她的回覆並不能完全讓我釋疑，
並恢復我基督教的信心。
我留下了很多問題，卻沒有答案。
About two months later,
the classmate who had taught me to pray
was also looking for a church to join.
She told me that she knew of a small and quiet church at Telok Kurau
called True Jesus Church.
She added that if one sat quietly in the pews towards the back of the chapel,
people would not come up to ask questions or chat.
大約兩個月之後，
那位教我禱告的同學，
也在尋找一間教會加入。
她告訴我，她知道直落古樓有一間小小安靜的教會，
稱為真耶穌教會。
她補充說，如果一個人安靜坐在教堂後面的長椅上，
就不會有人上來提問或聊天。
Since I am quite a shy person
who does not like crowds,
this church sounded ideal.
We decided to attend a service together
and joined a Wednesday evening service.
I was quite shocked by the prayer in tongues.
Still, I returned for a Friday evening service
when my classmate asked me to go with her again.
由於我是一個很害羞的人，
就是不喜歡人群，
這間教會聽起來很理想。
我們決定一起去參加聚會，
去參加星期三晚間的聚會。
我對靈言禱告感到很震驚。
儘管如此，我還是回去參加週五晚間的聚會，
當遇到我同學再次邀請我和她一起去。
During the closing prayer, I heard singing.
It was an angelic sound that hovered near the ceiling,
like a physical presence that swayed back and forth.
It was very soothing
and gave me a wonderfully peaceful sensation.
From then on, all fear of prayer in tongues disappeared.
在結束禱告的時候，我聽到歌聲。
那是一種天使般的聲音，盤旋在天花板附近，
就像是有一種來回搖擺的實體存在。
聲音讓人非常的舒服，
並且給我一種奇妙平靜的感覺。
從那時起，所有靈言禱告的恐懼都消失了。
COMING HOME 歸家
I stayed in the True Jesus Church to search for the truth.
I often felt that the sermons were directed at me.
Sometimes, they answered my questions about life,
and other times they strengthened my conviction
that this was the true church of God.
我留在真耶穌教會尋找真理。
我常常覺得講道是對我說的。
有時候，他們回答我關於生活的問題，
其他的時候他們加強了我的信心，
相信這就是神的真教會。
I asked many questions,
including those that had surfaced after conversations with my Muslim friends.
Thank God that the two brothers who studied the Bible with me
were able to provide Bible-based answers to all my questions.
我問了很多問題，
包括那些與我的回教朋友交談後出現的問題。
感謝神，有兩位跟我一起查經的弟兄，
能夠給我所有的問題提供基於聖經的答案。
However, many obstacles popped up after I started going to church.
It was difficult to attend services
because my family still opposed Christianity,
and I had to lie about where I was going
in order to get out of the house.
然而，在我開始去教會之後，出現了許多阻礙。
要參加聚會是很困難的，
因為我家庭仍然反對基督教，
我必須撒謊自已要去的地方，
為了走出家門。
A year after I came to True Jesus Church,
my father passed away.
After the funeral,
I was told to offer incense to his tablet on the altar every morning.
I refused, which angered my family
and caused them to see me as an unfilial child.
我來到真耶穌教會一年之後，
我父親去世了。
葬禮結束之後，
我被告知每天早上都要給神壇上他的牌位上香。
我拒絕了，這激怒了我的家人，
讓他們把我視為一個不孝順的孩子。
In addition, I had to buy or cook my own meals during festive seasons
as I refused to eat the food
that my family had sacrificed to the idols.
But through it all, I never saw these obstacles as a burden
because I knew that I had to do what was right in the eyes of God.
此外，過節期間我必須自己買飯或做飯，
因為我拒絕吃那些食物，
我家人已經給偶像拜拜的食物。
但縱觀這一切，我從未將這些阻礙視為負擔，
因為我知道，自已必須做神眼中看為正的事。
Over the next few years,
with increased understanding of the truth,
I was even more convinced that
I had found the true church.
My discussions with classmates from other Christian denominations
reinforced this belief
because I found that they did not fully adhere to the Bible.
在接下來的幾年裡，
隨著不斷加深真理的認識，
我已經更加確信，
自已已經找到了真教會。
我與其他基督教派同學的討論，
更加強了這個信仰，
因為我發現，他們並沒有完全遵守聖經。
I was eager to get baptized but had to wait,
since my family opposed my baptism
and I was not yet twenty-one years old.
As a minor, I wasn’t free to make this decision on my own.
But when I turned twenty,
I signed up for baptism because I didn’t want to delay any longer.
I did not tell my siblings
because I knew they would disagree with my decision.
I did tell my mother, who gave me permission to proceed.
我很想去受洗，但是必須等待，
因為我家人反對洗禮，
而且當時我還不到二十一歲。
身為一個未成年人，我不能自由的自己做出這個決定。
但當我到達二十歲的時候，
我報名參加洗禮，因為我不想再拖延了。
我沒有告訴自已的兄弟姊妹，
因為我知道，他們不會同意我的決定。
我確實告訴了我的母親，她允許我去進行。
More than two decades have passed,
and I still feel so very blessed
that God brought me to His true church.
I have had many doctrinal discussions with other Christians,
'even attending their services'
to see what their worship sessions were like.
I could never feel the presence of God in these other places.
二十多年過去了，
我仍然感覺很有福氣
神帶領我到了祂的真教會。
我與其他基督徒有過很多的教義討論，
‘甚至參加他們的聚會’
去看看他們的禮拜到底是什麼情況。
在這些其他的地方，我都沒有感覺到神的同在。
Conversely, attending worship services at the True Jesus Church
is like coming home.
Though I am still a shy person, I enjoy the fellowship with brothers and sisters.
The truth from the sermons continue to enlighten and inspire me,
and I derive so much peace and joy listening to the word of God
that I try to attend all services.
相反的，參加真耶穌教會的禮拜聚會，
就像回家一樣。
雖然我仍是一個害羞的人，但是我很享受與弟兄姐妹的團契交流。
講道的真理不斷啟發和激勵著我，
聆聽神的話語給我獲得了很多的平安和喜樂，
所以我試著參加所有的聚會。
Great is the Lord!
He led me to know Him even though I was a sinner
who once felt anger at the mention of His name.
I really thank God for such deep love and mercy.
All glory to Jesus!
主真偉大！
儘管我還是個罪人，祂就引導我認識祂
我曾經因為提到祂的名就感到憤怒。
我真的感謝神如此深的慈愛和憐憫。
願一切榮耀歸予耶穌！
小頁 markvmax@hotmail.com
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