13. Manna issue 59 - Striving for a Perfect Faith 努力追求完美的信心
What parents can do to establish faith in their children.
父母能什麼事來建立自已子女的信仰
Imperfect Mom 不完美的母親
A FAILURE 一次失敗
Before I had kids, I attended church services at least two times a week,
a weekly small-group Bible study, and week-long seminars.
I taught religious education classes, sang in choir,
and was an active member of the youth fellowship.
I prayed and read the Bible regularly.
在我有孩子之前，每週我至少參加兩次教會聚會，
每週一次的小組查經和為期一週的講習會。
我負責宗教教育課程教學，參加詩班，
而且是青年團契的活躍成員。
我經常禱告和讀經。
I was a conscientious worker at my full-time job as a magazine editor,
a friend who could be counted on to “always be there,”
and a daughter who helped her mother with her invalid father once a week.
Before I had kids, I managed to take a shower every day
and brushed my teeth at least twice a day.
我作為全職的雜誌編輯，認真工作，
是一個可以指望“永遠會在身邊”的朋友，
還是一個女兒，每週一次她會幫助自已的母親照她年邁體衰的父親。
在我有孩子之前，每天我都設法洗澡，
每天至少兩次刷牙。
But after the kids came, everything changed.
但在孩子出生後，一切都改變了。
I could barely make it to Sabbath services,
and when I did, I processed nothing of what I heard
(which were two-minute sound bites in between diapers changes, feedings, picking up toys, etc.).
I dropped out of all church work.
我幾乎沒辦法去參加安息日聚會，
當我有去聚會的時候，我卻沒有辨法理解自已所聽到的內容，
（那就是在換尿布，餵食，收拾玩具等等之間兩分鐘的講道聲音片段）。
我退出了所有的教會工作。
I attempted to do my job part-time
but ended up quitting after I realized that editing was impossible
because I could barely string together a coherent sentence
due to getting four-and-a-half hours of sleep a night
(usually broken up into ninety-minute increments).
我嘗試去做兼職工作，
但後來自已意識到，從事編輯工作是不可能的，於是離職了，
因為我幾乎無法串起一句連貫的句子，
因為每晚只睡了四個半小時，
（通常分為每個九十分鐘週期的增量）。
My friends thought I had dropped off the face of the earth,
and my mother saw me only when she invited me over for dinner.
I no longer felt any qualms about going out in public with oily, stringy hair,
and often fell asleep with fuzzy teeth.
我很多朋友以為，我已經從世上消失了，
只有我媽媽邀請我去吃晚飯時，她才會看到我。
在公眾面前頂著油膩，蓬鬆的亂髮，我不再感到任何不安，
並且經常帶著口腔不潔而睡。
I was a failure
—from spiritual health to personal hygiene.
我是個失敗者
—從靈命健全到個人衛生。
“What is going on?” I wondered.
If children were supposed to be a blessing,
why did my life look like it had been cursed after my kids arrived?
“這是怎麼回事呢？”我很驚訝。
如果孩子應該是一種祝福，
為什麼我孩子出生後，我的生活看起來就像受到詛咒呢？
Then I thought, maybe it wasn’t the children.
Maybe it was me.
Maybe I was doing everything wrong.
I felt inadequate as a mom
because my children were not on any kind of “prescribed schedule,”
and they were still not sleeping through the night even after twelve months.
然後我就想，也許問題不是孩子。
也許就是我有錯。
也許我做錯了一切的事情。
我覺得自己不適合當媽媽，
因為我的孩子沒有按著任何類型“預設的時間表”活動，
即使過了十二個月，他們仍然整晚無法睡覺。
I felt guilty as a Christian for dropping all forms of church work
in addition to my daily spiritual cultivation.
I felt like I had let down my friends,
especially the ones whom I avoided
because they liked to talk on the phone for too long.
And I’m pretty sure I smelled bad.
因為放棄了各種形式的教會工作，身為基督徒我就會感到內疚，
除了自已日常的靈修之外。
我感覺自已辜負了朋友，
特別是那些我會躲避的人，
因為他們喜歡打電話聊太久。
我相當確信自已身上有不好的氣味。
My life revolved around parenting my children,
and I wasn’t even sure if I was doing that right.
我的生活圍繞著養育孩子，
我甚至不確定自已是否做得對。
THE SEASON TO FOCUS ON CHILDREN
關愛兒童的時刻
Then one day, I came across this passage:
然後有一天，我突然翻到這一節：
So God created man in His own image;
in the image of God He created him;
male and female He created them.
Then God blessed them, and God said to them,
“Be fruitful and multiply.”
(Gen 1:27, 28a)
於是上帝照自己的形象創造了人；
按照上帝的形象創造了他；
他創造了男人和女人。
於是神賜福給他們，又對他們說：
「生養眾多，繁衍興旺。」
（創 1：27，28上）
Somehow, these verses penetrated my haze of guilt and failure,
and I came to an important realization:
The first “job” that God gave to man was to “be fruitful and multiply.”
In other words, the first job that God gave to us was to have children.
不知何故，這些經節穿透了我內疚和失敗的陰霾，
我了解到一個重要的事實：
神賦予人類的第一個“工作”就是要“生養眾多”。
換句話說，神給我們的第一份工作就是生孩子。
And with the act of having children came the responsibility of teaching them:
隨著生兒育女的行動則帶來教育他們的責任：
“Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God, the LORD is one.
Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength.
These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts.
Impress them on your children.”
(Deut 6:4-7a, NIV, emphasis mine)
“4以色列阿，你要聽！耶和華─我們神是獨一的主。
5你要盡心、盡性、盡力愛耶和華─你的神。
6我今日所吩咐你的話都要記在心上，
7也要殷勤教訓你的兒女。”
（申 6：4-7a，NIV，筆者重點）
So I started thinking that maybe I wasn’t so far off track as I thought.
Maybe it was okay that I was focusing my limited time, energy, and brain capacity on my children
—the first and most important “job” that God had given me.
所以我開始思考，也許我並沒有像自己想像的那麼偏離軌道。
也許我專注自已有限的時間，精力和腦力集中在自已的孩子身上是可以的，
—這是神給我的第一也是最重要的“工作”。
Maybe it was okay
for me to quit my job,
take a break from church work,
and focus on my babies,
who needed me and depended on my presence for their very survival.
After all…
也許這一切都可以，
我可以辭掉工作，
暫停教會事工休息一下，
並全心照顧自已的孩子們，
他們需要我並依靠我才能活下去。
畢竟…
To everything there is a season,
A time for every purpose under heaven:
A time to be born,
And a time to die;
A time to plant,
And a time to pluck what is planted;
A time to kill,
And a time to heal;
A time to break down,
And a time to build up…
(Eccl 3:1-3)
1凡事都有定期，
天下萬務都有定時。
2生有時，死有時；
栽種有時，拔出所栽種的也有時；
3殺戮有時，醫治有時；
拆毀有時，建造有時；
（傳 3：1-3）
I realized that now was the time to build up my children;
now was the season to meet their needs, to love them,
and to teach them about love.
This season
—their childhood
—would pass all too quickly,
and I did not want to squander the time I had with them.
我意識到現在是培養自已孩子的時間；
現在是滿足他們需求，疼愛他們的時候，
並且教導他們如何有愛。
這種時候，
—他們的童年，
—很快就會過去了，
我不想浪費與他們在一起的時光。
Another season would soon come when I could again do church work,
perhaps go back to work,
and be the reliable friend and devoted daughter that I wanted to be.
很快又會有另一段時間，那時我就可以從事教會工作了，
也許還可以回去工作，
變成自已希望成為的樣式，是位值得信賴的朋友和虔誠的女兒。
Feeling vindicated by God’s word in my direction in life,
I felt a sense of reassurance and peace that I was doing the right thing
in focusing on my children at this point.
But one thing niggled at my conscience….
感受到神話語給我人生方向指引的明證，
我感受到有一種安心和平安的感覺，顯示自已做的是正確的事情，
可以在這個時間點，讓我專心在自已的孩子身上。
但有一件事令我的良心不安...
“Impress them on your children…”
(Deut 6:7a)
“7要殷勤教訓你的兒女。...”
（申 6：7上）
Impress them on your children…
Impress them on your children…
要殷勤教訓你的兒女。
拓印愛主給你的兒女。
I was doing many things with my children,
but I felt that I was failing at impressing God’s commandments upon them
—at least not in the way that I was conditioned to do.
我與孩子做了很多的事情，
但我覺得自己卻不能把神的誡命灌輸給他們，
—至少不是照我以前受教的方式一樣。
MISSING THE BIG PICTURE 忽略大局
We were often late to Sabbath services, and sometimes we missed it altogether.
My older child went to religious education classes,
but she never finished her assigned homework or Bible reading, and I didn’t make her.
My younger child refused to go to religious education class altogether,
instead opting to do his little activity workbooks next to me as I sat in the worship service.
我們常常遲到參加安息日聚會，有時我們甚至完全錯過。
我的大孩子去參加宗教教育課程，
但她從來沒有完成自已所分配的家庭作業或讀經，而我也沒有強迫她。
我的小孩子拒絕一起去參加宗教教育課程，
而是選擇在我參加聚會時在我旁邊做他的小活動練習本。
I tried to read a children’s Bible to them at home,
but the reality was that we would often go long stretches without doing anything “biblical” at home.
I had invested in a huge collection of Bible cartoons,
but at most a handful of them were watched.
They could not tell you a complete Bible story if their lives depended on it.
我試著在家為他們朗讀兒童聖經，
但實際情況是，我們經常在家裡經過很長時間沒做任何“有關聖經”的事情。
我投資大量收藏了聖經卡通影片，
但最多只有一少部份有被看過。
即便拼了命，他們也無法告訴你完整的聖經故事。
Our prayers consisted of grace,
“Thank you, God, for this food,”
and our bedtime prayers,
“Please, God, don’t let me have any nightmares.”
My children hardly participated in prayers in Spirit,
and when they did, they lasted all of sixty seconds.
我們的禱告充滿恩典，
“感謝神賜給我們食物。”
以及我們的睡前禱告，
“神啊，請不要讓我作噩夢。”
我的孩子幾乎沒有專心禱告，
而且當他們禱告時，他自只會維持續短短六十秒。
At one point, when I realized that this type of spiritual pursuit was missing in our lives,
I began to institute changes.
I “strongly encouraged” my older child to watch the Bible cartoons every morning.
I began reading the children’s Bible to my children every night,
whether they wanted to hear it or not.
I forced my daughter to finish her assigned church homework.
I even tried praying in the Spirit with them.
曾有一時，當我意識到這種屬靈追求消失在我們生活時，
我開始實施改變。
我“強力鼓勵”自已的大孩子每天早上看聖經動畫片。
每天晚上我開始給自已的孩子們讀兒童聖經，
不管他們想不想聽。
我強迫女兒完成她教會分配的作業。
我甚至嘗試與他們一起用靈言禱告。
Somehow, though, as the level of “spiritual” activity increased,
so did the sense of artificiality.
Yes, it seemed like we were doing the “right” things,
but things felt forced.
There was no genuine sense of engagement and enthusiasm from my children.
但不知何故，隨著「屬靈」活動程度的提高，
而人為的感覺也是如此。
是的，看起來我們正在做「正確」的事情，
但事情感覺是被迫的。
我的孩子們沒有表示出真正參與感和熱情。
I forced myself to take a step back and evaluate the situation.
What was I doing?
Why was I doing it?
Was it even effective?
Were they learning what really mattered through all this activity?
我強迫自己退一步並評估這種的情況。
我那時正在做什麼事呢？
我為什麼要這麼做呢？
那那麼作真的有效嗎？
他們是否透過這些活動學到了真正重要的事情呢？
One of my worst fears is becoming like a Pharisee
—having the outward appearance of piety,
but lacking its true substance inwardly.
我最害怕的事情之一就是變得像法利賽人一樣，
—有虔誠的外表，
但內在卻缺乏其真正實質。
“Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites!
For you pay tithe of mint and anise and cummin,
and have neglected the weightier matters of the law: justice and mercy and faith.”
(Mt 23:23)
“23你們這假冒為善的文士和法利賽人有禍了！
因為你們將薄荷、茴香、芹菜，獻上十分之一，
那律法上更重的事，就是公義、憐憫、信實，反倒不行了。
(太 23：23)
Somehow, what I was doing smacked of pharisaism.
I felt that in all our “doing,”
we were missing the big picture
and perhaps neglecting the “weightier matters of the law.”
不知為何，我所做的事情帶有一點法利賽主義的味道。
我覺得在我們所做的一切事情中，
我們正錯過了整體的情況，
甚至可能忽略了“法律上更重要的問題”。
A CLEAR AND LASTING UNDERSTANDING OF GOD 清晰長久的了解神
I began to wonder how it was possible to “impress” God’s commands upon my children
in a way that was genuine as well as effective.
One of the definitions of “impress” from the Encarta World English Dictionary is
“to make sure that somebody has a clear and lasting understanding, memory, or mental image of something.”
我開始思考要怎麼作才可能把神的誡命“拓印”在我的孩子，
以一種真實而有效的方式。
Encarta 世界英語字典對「impress」的定義之一是
“確保某人對某事有清晰且持久的理解、記憶或心理圖像。”
I began to pray to God to help me teach my children
so that they could truly have a “clear and lasting understanding” of Him
and be able to understand the “weightier matters” of life
—to understand what really mattered.
I laid out before Him all my weaknesses, my confusion, my failure,
and asked Him to teach me how to teach my children.
我開始向神禱告來幫助我教導自已的孩子，
使他們能夠真正“清晰而長久的了解”祂，
並且能夠理解生活“更重要的事”，
—去了解真正重要的事情。
我向祂傾訴自已所有的軟弱，困惑，失敗，
並請祂來教導我怎麼教育自已的孩子。
Slowly, I began to find the way,
but not without having to give up many preconceived notions of faith.
I had to give up caring what people thought of my parenting and my children.
I had to give up timetables and learn to trust my children and God’s timing.
I had to give up doing things in the way I thought best
but instead rely on God to do things in the way He thinks best.
慢慢的，我開始找到出路，
但並不用放棄許多先前即有的信仰觀念。
我必須放棄去關心人們對我教養方式和孩子的看法。
我必須放棄行事曆並學會相信自已的孩子和神的時間安排。
我必須放棄以自已認為最好的方式做事，
反而要依靠神以祂認為最好的方式行事。
In giving these up, I found a closer and more genuine walk with God,
and my children are slowly but surely developing a “clear and lasting understanding” of God and His commands.
在放棄這些事情之後，我發現與神有更加親近和真誠的關係。
我的孩子正慢慢且穩定的發展出一種對神與祂誡命“清晰而長久的了解”。
Here, I share with you what I learned, and what worked for my family:
此處，我與大家分享自已所學習的體驗，以及對我的家庭有用的方法：
Follow Your Child’s Interest 關注你子女的興趣
In my research on how people learn,
I came across some interesting information:
unless people are interested in and engaged in what they are learning,
they will not retain the information long term.1
在我研究人們怎麼學習的方法時，
我剛好發現了一些很有趣的資訊：
除非人們對所學內容很感興趣並且積極的參與，
他們不會長期保留這些資訊。1
I thought back to my years in school
and realized that explained why I retained about 2% of what I learned
—I couldn’t have cared less about 98% of what was taught.
我回想起自已學校的歲月，
並了解到這種情況解釋了為何自已只能記住自已所學大約 2% 的知識，
—我對所教內容的 98% 根本就沒有興趣。
I applied this bit of information to teaching my children about God.
I evaluated the “spiritual” activities I was doing with my children
and retained what really interested them.
我以此一點點的資訊來教導自已的孩子有關於神的知識。
我評估了自已和孩子們一起進行的“屬靈”活動，
並保留了他們真正感興趣的內容。
My children would often ask me to read the Bible to them before bed,
so I knew that they were interested in that.
They also liked the comfort of praying before bed,
but we no longer prayed in Spirit.
They would pray in words of understanding about things that mattered to them,
whether it was not having nightmares,
thanking God for the fun things they did that day,
or wishing a sick friend a speedy recovery.
我的孩子會常常求我給他們在睡前讀聖經，
所以我知道他們對這件事很有興趣。
他們也喜歡睡前禱告的舒適感，
但我們不再用靈言禱告。
他們會用悟性語言來禱告他們關心的事情，
無論是沒有做惡夢，
感謝神給他們那天做的趣事，
或祈求生病的朋友早日康復。
I no longer “encouraged” my children to watch the Bible cartoons
or forced my daughter to finish her church homework,
which included a weekly memory verse.
However, I did buy a CD with memory verses set to upbeat music,
which the children enjoyed.
我不再“鼓勵”自已的孩子去看聖經卡通，
或強迫我女兒完成她教會的作業，
其中包括每週記憶經節。
不過，我確實買了一張快節奏記憶經文的音樂 CD，
而孩子們都很喜歡。
If something no longer interested them,
I would not force them to continue
but instead continually tried to find other avenues for them to learn about God.
如果他們某件事不再感興趣了，
我就不會強迫他們繼續，
而是不斷嘗試給他們尋找其他方法來了解神。
Adding all of these activities up didn’t seem like much,
but I realized that this was enough for them right now.
Little people have little appetites and require more frequent meals
—and perhaps this applied to spiritual food as well.
I could see that my children were “digesting”
these small, frequent meals of God’s word and simple prayer,
and changes were happening.
把這些所有的活動匯總起來看起來似乎不多，
但我了解到現在這對他們來說已經足夠了。
小孩子胃口很小，要常常進食，
—或許這也適用於屬靈的糧食。
我可以看到自已孩子正在“消化”，
這些神話語和單純禱告的少量多餐，
結果改變就發生了。
Sometimes in the car, my children would randomly ask me questions like,
“When we die do we become angels?”
Or I would hear comments like,
“God is so powerful, He can do anything.
He could squash a car if He wanted.”
有時在車上，我的孩子會隨意問我像這樣的問題：
“我們死後會變成天使嗎？”
或者我會聽到像這樣的評語：
“神大有能力，祂無所不能。
如果祂願意，就可以壓扁一輛車。”
These may seem like simple things,
but the important detail here was that
they were talking about God out of their own volition,
which meant that they were thinking about Him.
They were trying to figure out who God is and His relationship with us.
They were developing an interest in spiritual matters and,
more importantly, were enjoying the process of getting to know Him.
這些事情看似都很簡單，
但這裡重要的細節就是
他們都是發自內心談論神，
這代表了他們正在想著祂。
他們正試著弄清楚神是誰，以及祂與我們的關係。
他們正對屬靈事物產生了興趣，
更重要的是，正享受著認識祂的過程。
This enjoyment and interest would be the very thing
that would help develop that “clear and lasting understanding” of God and His commands.
這種享受和興趣正是，
有助於培養對神及誡命的“清晰而長久的了解”。
Focus on Biblical Principles Rather than Biblical Knowledge
專注聖經的原則而不是聖經的知識
Sometimes I think we as parents are tempted to stuff our children with biblical knowledge
so that we can assure ourselves that we are doing our jobs teaching them God’s word.
It is something that we can measure, something we can test.
有時我覺得，我們身為父母，會想把聖經的知識塞進自已的孩子，
這樣我們就能放心，自己有盡責任地向他們傳授神的話語。
那是我們可以測量，可以測試的事情。
But in so doing, are we neglecting “the weightier matters of the law
—justice, mercy, and faithfulness”?
Are we neglecting the principles of God’s laws
in favor of the vehicle in which they are delivered?
Because isn’t that what these Bible stories are
—vehicles to teach us what really matters
—living out God’s command to love each other, to act justly, to show mercy,
to be faithful to God in our daily lives?
但若這樣做，我們是否忽略了“律法中更重要的事
—公義，憐憫和信實”呢？
我們是否因為推崇傳達神律法的媒介，
而忽略了神律法的原則呢？
因為那不正是這些聖經故事嗎？
—教導我們什麼才是真正重要的媒介，
—活出神的誡命，彼此相愛，行公義，好憐憫，
在日常生活忠於神呢？
Sometimes, children are not ready to learn Bible stories or memorize Bible verses,
but all children are ready to learn the principles of the Bible.
A child can learn the biblical principle of love when someone wants to play with his favorite toy.
He can learn the principle of kindness when he sees a lonely child on the playground.
He can learn the principle of obedience when a parent asks him to do something he does not want to do.
有時，孩子還沒有準備好要學習聖經故事或記住聖經經節，
但所有孩子都已準備好可以學習聖經的原則。
當有人想玩他最喜歡的玩具時，孩子就能學到聖經愛的原則。
當他在遊樂場上看到獨單的孩子時，他就可以學到友好的原則。
當有父母要求他做一些自已不願意做的事情時，他就可以學習順服的原則。
God’s name may never be mentioned and a Bible verse never quoted,
but in these situations, a child is learning about God all the same.
In a way, this is an even more important learning opportunity,
because it has to do with real life.
It has to do with living out God’s teachings,
and that is ultimately what God wants us to do
—to convert our faith into deeds.
神的名字可能從未被提及，也從未引用過任何一節聖經經文，
但在這些情況時，孩子亦同樣在學習認識神。
從某種程度上來說，這甚至是一個更重要的學習機會，
因為它都與現實生活息息相關。
這與行出神的教導有關，
而這最終也是神希望我們去做的事
—將我們的信仰轉化為行動。
I learned to not be too concerned
if my son could not get the story straight about Jericho
or if he couldn’t tell me how many loaves and fish Jesus used to feed 5,000.
However, I am very concerned about each and every situation my children encounter
that may test their character and teach them how to live out a biblical principle.
我學會了不要太擔心
如果我兒子不能正確講述耶利哥城的故事，
或是他不能告訴我耶穌用了多少個餅和幾條魚來餵飽 5000 人。
然而，我非常的關心，自已孩子每次全部遇到的情況，
那些情況可能會考驗他們的品格，並教導他們如何實踐聖經的原則。
Be Patient 耐心等待
It’s not to say that
it is not important to know the Bible, to go to religious education class, or to pray in Spirit.
All of this is very important.
However, it may not happen in the timetable that you wish.
這並不是說，
要學習聖經，參加宗教教育課程或在靈言禱告是不重要的。
這一切活動都非常重要。
然而，它可能不會按照您所希望的時間表而發生。
In raising my young children,
I had to admit that I didn’t fully comprehend what was going on with them
—developmentally, emotionally, spiritually.
When I tried to expose them to something new and they balked,
I had to trust them and trust that somehow they were not yet ready for it.
在養育年幼的孩子的過程中，
我必須承認，自已並沒有完全理解他們的發展，
—發育狀況上，情感上和屬靈方面上。
當我試圖讓他們接觸新事物而他們卻猶豫不決時，
我必須信任他們，相信他們不知怎了還沒有做好準備去接受它。
When my younger child turned three,
I was so happy that I could finally send him to kindergarten class at church
and I could enjoy my Sabbath worship in peace.
But he absolutely refused to go.
當我的小兒子三歲時，
我很高興，自已終於可以送他去教會的幼稚班，
而我可以安心的享受安息日聚會。
但他卻堅決拒絕去上課。
Every week I encouraged, cajoled, and bribed him to go, to no avail.
Other kids (many who were even younger than him) were happy as a clam,
going to not just one but both sessions of kindergarten class.
But no, my child stubbornly refused.
我每週都鼓勵，哄騙並賄賂他去，但都不能成功。
其他的孩子(其中許多孩子甚至都比他還小)都開心得不得了，
他們不只上了一堂課，反而是連上了兩節幼稚班的課。
但事與願違，我孩子卻頑固的拒絕了。
Finally, I gave up.
For a year and a half,
he spent every Sabbath at my side in the adult worship service
with a little workbook and coloring pencils.
最後我放棄了。
在一年半的時間裡，
他每個安息日都會待在我身邊參加成人聚會，
帶著一本小練習本和彩色鉛筆。
Then one day (finally, at four and a half years old),
ten minutes before the worship service started,
he stated, “I am going to class today.”
My husband dropped him off in class,
and since then, he has been an active participant and enjoyed every single class.
然後有一天（終於，四歲半時），
在聚會開始前的十分鐘，
他說：“我今天要去上課。”
我丈夫就送他去上課，
從那時起，他就一直都是積極的參與者並享受每一節課。
There’s no telling what clicked in that brain of his,
but somehow, it was time, and he was ready.
更無從得知的是他那小腦中到底發生什麼事，
但不知何故，時間成熟了，他就已經準備好。
What I learned is that
even though your child may not be interested in something now,
it doesn’t mean that he will never be interested in it.
Even though your child may not be interested in Bible stories,
or praying, or going to class,
it does not mean that this will always be the case.
我學到的是，
即使你的孩子現在可能對某件事不感興趣，
但那並不代表他永遠不會對它有興趣。
即使你的孩子可能不會對聖經故事，或禱告、或上課感興趣，
但這並不代表情況會一直如此。
Sometimes, he may not be developmentally, emotionally, or spiritually ready.
In that case, you can still focus on reinforcing biblical principles in daily life
and expose him to whatever you think might be edifying to him, following his interests.
有時候，他可能在發育狀態，情感或屬靈上還沒有做好準備。
在那種情況時，你仍然可以在日常生活中專心強調聖經原則，
並且因著他的興趣，讓他接觸你認為可以造就他的任何事物。
Live God’s Teachings 活出神的教導
Another bit of interesting information about how people learn:
I have read that 90% of what we learn is through example.
關於人們如何學習的另一個有趣資訊：
我曾經讀到過，我們學習的 90% 都是透過學習例子。
This information was actually very disconcerting to me,
knowing how much I struggle with my own faith and my own character.
My children would be in a very sorry state if 90% of what they learned indeed came from my example.
這個訊息其實讓我非常不安，
因為知道自己的信仰和性格到底經歷了多少的掙扎。
如果 90% 他們所學的知識都確實是來自我的榜樣，那他們就會很可憐。
But this did make me realize how important my actions were in my teaching.
Our children are learning important principles every time they see us operate,
from the words we speak, to how we treat others, to how we spend our time.
If the studies are right,
then our actions in our daily lives will teach them more than our words ever will.
但這確實讓我意識到，自已的行為在教學上有多麼重要。
孩子每次看到我們的行為舉止時，都正好會學習重要的原則，
從我們所說的話，到我們如何對待別人，到我們如何度過自己的時間。
如果這個研究是正確的，
那麼我們在日常生活的行為將比言語更能教導他們。
Maybe that’s why God said, 或許那就是為何神說，
“Impress them on your children.
Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road,
when you lie down and when you get up.
Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads.
Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates.”
(Deut 6:7-9, NIV)
“7也要殷勤教訓你的兒女。
無論你坐在家裡，行在路上，躺下，起來，都要談論。
8也要繫在手上為記號，戴在額上為經文；
9又要寫在你房屋的門框上，並你的城門上。”
（申 6：7-9，NIV）
In other words, we need to live out God’s teachings in our daily lives
—in our homes (how do we treat our family members behind closed doors?),
in our cars while we’re on the road
(are we cursing at the guy who just cut us off?)
—from the time we get up to the time we lie down.
換句話說，我們需要在日常生活中活出神的教導
—在家裡（關起門來我們是如何對待家人的？），
在路上開車時
(我們是否在咒罵剛剛超車切入我們道路的人？)
—從我們起床到躺下的時間裡。
We need to live out God’s principles
in what we choose to do with our hands and what we choose to think about in our heads.
We need God’s teachings to be the framework of our family and our communities.
我們需要活出神的原則，
在我們選擇去用自已雙手所做的事，還有在我們腦中選擇所思考的事情。
我們需要的教導作為我們家庭和社區的框架。
Yes, sometimes our faith is tested by huge, fiery trials.
I’ve found, though, that more often our faith is refined in the crucible of daily life.
是的，有時候我們的信心遇到巨大嚴峻的試煉測試。
然而，我發現，我們的信心更多時候是在日常生活的嚴峻考驗受到磨練。
This is really the most important and effective way that we can teach our children,
but this is also the hardest, because our children see us day in and day out
—our strengths and our many weaknesses.
I know that many times,
I have been compelled to try harder, not because of my own desire for piety,
but because I know that I need to become a better person for the sake of my children.
這確實是我們可以教育孩子最重要，最有效的方式，
但這也是最難的，因為孩子每天都會看到我們進進出出，
—我們的優點和許多缺點。
我知道，大部份的時候，
我被迫要更加努力，那不是因為我自己渴望變虔誠，
而是因為我知道，為了自已孩子的原故，我需要成為一個更好的人。
I have had to admit to my children that I was wrong
and to tell them not to follow my example.
This is important to show them the consistency of God’s teachings
—that it applies to everyone, and that there are no double standards.
我曾必須向孩子承認自已錯了，
並告訴他們不要學我。
非常重要的是，這向他們展示了神教導的一致性，
—它對每個人都適用，且沒有雙重標準。
Interestingly enough, instead of undermining my children’s respect for me,
admitting my wrong has actually increased their respect.
Perhaps it is because somehow, as young as they are, they implicitly understand that
it is harder to admit wrong than to pretend that you’re right.
Or perhaps, they realize that we are all in this together, striving for perfection in this imperfect body.
有趣的是，不但沒有削弱孩子對我的尊重，
承認自已錯誤反而真的增加了他們的尊重。
或許是因為某種原因，儘管他們還很年幼，但他們下意識就明白，
可以承認錯誤比假裝自己正確是更加困難的。
或者，他們明白，我們大家都是一起處在這種情況，都在這不完美的身體中努力追求完美。
Love Your Child 疼愛自已的孩子
What better way to teach your children about God’s love
than to love them with the love of the Lord?
除了用主的愛去疼愛孩子之外，
還有什麼更好的方式來教導他們了解神的慈愛呢？
If it is true that people learn from example,
then the best example is to love our children.
Spend this season with them, because it is so short.
Impress upon them the word of God through our love for them and through our daily lives.
Fill them up with love and build them up on God’s teachings,
so that they in turn can love others and build others up in God’s teachings.
如果人們會從榜樣中學習，
那麼最好的身教就是去疼愛自已的孩子。
與他們一起度過這段時光，因為那真是如此短暫。
透過我們對他們的關愛和我日常生活，給他們灌輸神的話語。
讓他們充滿愛，並以神的教誨造就他們，
這樣他們接著就能關懷別人，並以神的教誨造就別人。
Perhaps one day, when they are mature Christians,
they will look back and say,
“I learned to strive for perfect faith through my imperfect parents.”
也許有一天，當他們成為成熟的基督徒，
他們將可以回首往事，說：
“我從自已不完美的父母身上學習努力追求完美的信仰。”
1. Memory and Liturgy:
The Place of Memory in the Composition and Practice of Liturgy.
Atkins, Peter. Ashgate Publishing, 2004.
1. 記憶與聚會儀式：
在聚會儀式的架構與實踐中記憶的作用。
Atkins, Peter. Ashgate 出版社，2004 年。
小頁 markvmax@hotmail.com
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