2. Manna issue 66 - A Father's Thoughts on Christian Parenting 身為基督徒教養子女，一位父親的想法
Set an example; pray unceasingly.
作好榜樣：不停的禱告
Philip Shee—Dubai, United Arab Emirates
阿聯杜拜 許腓力 執事
“And you, fathers, do not provoke your
children to wrath, but bring them up in the
training and admonition of the Lord.” (Eph
6:4)
4你們作父親的，不要惹兒女的氣，只要照著主的教訓和警戒養育他們。
(弗 6：4)
As a Christian, fatherhood is an
important responsibility given by God
to nurture and raise children in the Lord.
Since the Bible describes children as “a
heritage from the Lord” (Ps 127:3), the
role of a father cannot be taken lightly.
身為基督徒，父親的職責，是神所給予很重要的責任，
要在主裡好好養育子女長大。
因為聖經把子女當作是"神所賞賜的產業"
(詩 127：3)
父親的角色不是隨隨便便的。
Fathers must understand that their
primary function is not only to provide for
their children’s immediate physical needs,
but also to support and educate them.
While the provision of daily necessities
and education are undeniably important,
it is paramount that fathers raise their
children with the word of God, instilling
proper Christian values.
父親一定要了解到，
他們主要的功能，不只是讓子女在物質上的需要有所滿足，
而且也要幫助他們教育他們。
雖然供給每日的需求和提供教育機會，
無可否認的非常的重要，
最重要的是，父親可以用神的話語來教養子女，
灌輸他們基督徒的價值。
GOING BEYOND INSTRUCTIONS 超出教導的行為
“For though you might have ten thousand
instructors in Christ, yet you do not have
many fathers; for in Christ Jesus I have
begotten you through the gospel.” (1 Cor
4:15)
15你們學基督的，師傅雖有一萬，為父的卻是不多，
因我在基督耶穌裡用福音生了你們。
(林前 4：15)
Paul had no children of his own. Yet,
in his ministry, he regarded himself not
as an instructor, but a father. Paul’s
reference to fatherhood in his ministry
highlights a common understanding: that
a father must take a stronger interest in
the cultivation of his children’s faith than
any instructor would.
保羅沒有自已的小孩。
然而他傳導的時候，
他不把自已當成是一位指導者，而是父親。
保羅傳道參考父親的角色，
重點強調了一個一般的認知：
就是父親是一定比任何一位老師，
更加注重教育子女的信仰。
Although education involves informing
and instructing students, a father should
go beyond that and also serve as a role
model. Paul urged the Corinthians to
“imitate me” (1 Cor 4:16) and further
added, “imitate me, just as I also imitate
Christ” (1 Cor 11:1). This reminds us
that a father’s conduct should exemplify
Christian values.
雖然教育包含了知識傳播及指導學生，
父親更是超越了這些，同時也要作為一個好榜樣。
保羅鼓勵哥林多教會"效法我"
(林前 4：16)
而且還補充說，
"1你們該效法我，像我效法基督一樣。"
(林前 11：1)
這裡提醒我們，
父親的行為，應該成為表現基督徒價觀的榜樣。
One can never overstate children’s
ability to observe others in their daily
lives and their natural tendency to imitate
those around them. We can, therefore,
imagine the irony of a father teaching
his children to be humble, but is then
seen by his children bragging about his
own or his children’s achievements to
relatives. Or, if a father tells his children
about the importance of paying attention
during church services, but dozes off
next to them during sermons. Such
situations are not uncommon and reflect
the inconsistencies of our instruction and
conduct.
沒有人會說，日常生活中，
小孩子有能力觀察別人是誇張的行為，
他們自然而然就會模仿身邊的人。
所以，我們可以想像的到，
父親教小孩要謙卑的諷刺，
但是接著又被小孩看見，
父親正向親朋好友，吹噓自已和小孩的成就。
或著，假設父親告訴孩子，聚會要專心的重要性，
但是坐在小孩身旁聽道時，卻在打瞌睡。
這樣的情況，都不太平常，
反應出，我們的教導和行為不一致。
When was the last time our children
witnessed us losing our patience when
driving? Do they hear us complaining
against God when our lives enter
turbulent times? The inconsistencies of
our conduct and our instruction may
cause confusion, send conflicting signals
and even “provoke our children to
wrath” when we then try to give them
instructions to do the right thing.
我們小孩最後一次，看到我們開車失去脾氣，是什麼時候呢？
當生活起起伏伏的時候，
他們有沒有聽過我們抱怨神呢？
我們的行為及對他們的教導，不一致的時候，
就會引起混亂，發出矛盾的訊號，
甚至會"引起兒女生氣"，
而我們當時正試著要給他們教導，
作正確的事。
As fathers, we therefore need to
constantly build upon our own spiritual
cultivation, and be conscious of our
conduct, especially before our children.
Isaac must have observed Abraham’s
own faith and life of worship as he grew
up. This was evident in his ability to ask
Abraham about the rites in offering:
“Look, the fire and the wood, but where
is the lamb for a burnt offering?” (Gen
22:7).
身為父親，所以我們一直要讓自已的靈性成長，
留意自已的行為，特別是在小孩面前。
以撒他成長的時候，一定看到了亞伯拉罕自已的信仰，
及敬拜神的生活。
他有這個能力是很明顯的，
就是他問亞伯拉罕有關獻祭儀式的問題：
7請看，火與柴都有了，但燔祭的羊羔在那裡呢？
(創 22：7)
Do our children wake up in the morning
to the sound of our prayer? Do they see
us buried in our Bible when they come
and bid us goodnight before they turn in?
Are they familiar with our habit of quiet
reflection and devotion to hymns, Bible
reading and prayer every day? Do they
experience the joy and peace that comes
from putting our trust in God as a family?
Will these impressions surface in their
minds as they themselves go through
life’s various challenges?
我們小孩一早起來，有沒有聽到我們禱告的聲音呢？
在他們上床睡覺之前，來向我們道晚安的時候，
有沒有看過我們在讀經呢？
安靜的反省，專心唱讚美詩，每天讀經禱告，
他們對我們的這些習慣熟悉嗎？
身為一家人，他們有沒有體驗過，
信靠主的喜樂和平安呢？
當他們自已生活中遇到各式各樣的挑戰之時，
之前的這些印象，會不會在他們的心中浮現出來呢？
All these questions should go through
a Christian father’s mind consistently as
he strives to improve himself before God.
這一切的問題，隨著在神面前不斷努力的改善自已，
都應該不斷地經過每位基督徒父親的心中。
START EARLY BY BUILDING A
FAMILY ALTAR
早早開始建立家庭祭壇
“Train up a child in the way he should go,
and when he is old, he will not depart from
it.” (Prov 22:6)
6教養孩童，使他走當行的道，就是到老他也不偏離。
(箴 22：6)
Fathers should grasp the opportunity
to strengthen the spirituality of their
children from the time they are born.
Young children begin understanding
things and events much earlier than they
can actually express their knowledge.
When asked to pray, even pre-toddlers
can respond by clasping their hands and
shutting their eyes.
從小孩一出生開始，父親就應該抓住機會，
加強小孩的靈性能力。
年輕的孩子可以開始在真正表現出知識之前，
提早了解事情。
當大家說要禱告的時候，
甚至是學步的小孩也能回應，
就是握起雙手，閉上眼睛。
Fathers can start early by praying with
their children before meals and before
bedtime. Arrive early to church so they
are familiar with singing praises and
offering prayers to God. Expose them to
Christian hymns at home. This mindset
and lifestyle will help develop good
habits. When our children grow older,
we can share Bible stories with them and
send them to Religious Education classes
in church. As our children mature, they
can even lead family prayers or worship.
父親也可以很早就開始，
就和孩子在飯前禱告，睡覺前禱告。
早早到教會去，
這樣他們就很熟悉唱讚美詩，並且向神禱告。
讓孩子們在家裡，隨著都處於有基督徒讚美詩的環境。
這種想法和生活的模式，會幫助發展良好的習慣。
當我們的兒女逐漸長大，
就能向他們分享聖經的故事，
送他們去教會參加宗教教育。
當孩子長大成熟了，
他們甚至可以帶領家庭禱告和聚會。
When our family altar is established,
our faith becomes the center of our
family life. Such practices are consistent
with the principles of the Bible:
當家中有了家庭祭壇，
信仰就會成為我們家庭生活的中心。
這樣的作法，是和聖經的原則相符合的：
And these words which I command you
today shall be in your heart. You shall teach
them diligently to your children, and shall
talk of them when you sit in your house,
when you walk by the way, when you lie
down, and when you rise up. You shall bind
them as a sign on your hand, and they shall
be as frontlets between your eyes. You shall
write them on the doorposts of your house
and on your gates.
(Deut 6:6–9)
6我今日所吩咐你的話都要記在心上，
7也要殷勤教訓你的兒女。無論你坐在家裡，行在路上，躺下，起來，都要談論。
8也要繫在手上為記號，戴在額上為經文；
9又要寫在你房屋的門框上，並你的城門上。
(申 6：6-9)
A VARIED TEACHING STYLE 各式各樣的教導方式
“All Scripture is given by inspiration of
God and is profitable for doctrine, for
reproof, for correction, for instruction in
righteousness.” (2 Tim 3:16)
16聖經都是神所默示的（或作：凡神所默示的聖經），
於教訓、督責、使人歸正、教導人學義都是有益的，
(提後 3：16)
When we use the word of God
as the basis to educate our children,
we must use a balanced approach,
appropriately adjusting the method and
tone as necessary. Our children should be
patiently taught when ignorant, lovingly
encouraged when down, promptly
admonished when disobedient, firmly
rebuked when rebellious and strictly
chastised when stubborn. We must learn
and be willing to employ each technique
as required.
當我們把神的話，作為基礎來教導小孩，
我們一定要用的很平衡，
盡可能合宜地調整所用的方法和步調。
當小孩無知的時候，就要好好用耐心來教導，
當灰心的時候，就要用愛來鼓勵他們，
當不乖的時候，就要馬上勸告他們，
而變得很叛逆的時候，就要嚴嚴的斥責他們，
如果非常的頑固，就要嚴格的管教他們。
我們一定要試著學習，
並且願意運用一切的需要的技巧。
The following passages provide
guidance to the balance we need to strike
between being overly harsh, or overly
lenient:
下面的經節，給我們提供所需要的指引，
可以在太過嚴厲及太過寬鬆之間，好好努力：
“Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest
they become discouraged.” (Col 3:21)
21你們作父親的，不要惹兒女的氣，恐怕他們失了志氣。
(西 3：21)
“He who spares his rod hates his son,
but he who loves him disciplines him
promptly.” (Prov 13:24)
24不忍用杖打兒子的，是恨惡他；疼愛兒子的，隨時管教。
(箴 13：24)
We need to avoid being overly harsh,
for that discourages or even provokes our
children, and may even shatter their selfesteem.
At the same time, we must not
be like Eli, who was rejected by God along
with his house because he did not do
enough to restrain his sons’ wickedness
and “honored [them] more than God”
(1 Sam 2:29–34). Such balance requires
wisdom and understanding from the
Lord. Fathers should pray for guidance
from the Lord to properly instruct,
correct, and discipline their children.
我們要避免過度嚴厲，
因為這麼作會讓孩子灰心，
甚至會讓孩子很生氣，
或許甚至會破滅他們的自尊。
同時，我們一定不可以像祭司以利一樣，
他和全家，都被神所拒絕，
因為他作得不夠，沒有管好自已兒子邪惡的行為，
"尊重自已更甚於去尊重神"。
(撒上 2：29-34)
要作到這樣的平衡，需要從神而來的智慧和洞察力。
父親應該要禱告，求神來帶領，
讓他能好好正確的指教孩子，
作好管教孩子的工作。
SECURING THEIR FUTURE 保守他們的未來
As parents, we should strive to provide
a good environment for our children and
become their mentor. When Abraham
was old and advanced in age, he
arranged for Isaac’s marriage by making
his old servant swear by the Lord that he
would not take a wife for Isaac from the
daughters of the Canaanites (Gen 24:1–
4). This was to ensure that Isaac’s faith
would not be corrupted or compromised
by the practices of the land.
身為父母，我們都會努力給孩子，提供良好的生活環境，
成為他們的良師益友。
當亞伯拉罕年老，年紀非常大的時候，
他安排了以撒的婚姻，
派自已的老僕人，以神的名起誓說，
他絕對不會為以撒，從迦南人的女兒之中，選來娶為妻。
(創 24：1-4)
這就是為了確保，以撒的信仰不會被敗壞，
或是因為這塊土地上的某些行為，而有了妥協。
When David knew that his time was up,
he urged Solomon to walk in the ways of
God and to keep His commandments. He
warned Solomon about Joab and Shimei,
and instructed him to show kindness to
Barzillai (1 Kgs 2:1–10). This heightened
the vigilance of Solomon and allowed him
to see and prepare for the danger ahead.
當大衛知道，自已的年日無多之時，
他鼓勵所羅門，要走到神的路上，遵守祂的誡命。
他警告所羅門，要小心約押和示每，
並教他要對巴西萊要顯出慈愛。
(王上 2：1-10)
這是強調了，所羅門很警醒，
讓他可以看出未來的危險，並且作好準備。
We must do our part to create a good
spiritual environment for our children.
Preparation for our children’s future must
be accompanied by our daily intercession
for them:
我們一定要為了孩子，盡力創造出一個良好屬靈的環境。
為了孩子的未來好好準備，
就一定要伴隨著每日為他們代禱：
So it was, when the days of feasting had
run their course, that Job would send and
sanctify them, and he would rise early
in the morning and offer burnt offerings
according to the number of them all. For
Job said, ‘it may be that my sons have
sinned and cursed God in their hearts.’ Thus
Job did regularly.
(Job 1:5)
5筵宴的日子過了，約伯打發人去叫他們自潔。
他清早起來，按著他們眾人的數目獻燔祭；
因為他說：恐怕我兒子犯了罪，心中棄掉神。約伯常常這樣行。
(伯 1：5)
Job rose up morning after morning
to make burnt offerings on behalf of
his children. Doing so exemplified his
self-discipline, devotion and dedication
towards his sons and daughters. Like
Job, we must constantly be concerned
about our children’s standing before God,
a matter we can bring to God on their
behalf.
約伯每天早晨起來，就為了他孩子獻祭。
這麼作，就是他自律，專注和奉獻，
成為他兒子女兒的最好模範。
就像約伯，我們一定要不斷在神面前，
關心自已兒好的情況，
這也是我們在神面，可以為他們作的事。
FINAL REFLECTIONS 最後的反省
Fatherhood is a rewarding experience.
For some, the reward may be the pride
of witnessing their children’s success and
achievements in the world or watching
their children lead happy lives starting a
family of their own. For others, it may
be receiving their children’s love and
gratitude in return.
父親的角色，是一個會得到回報的經驗。
對一些人而言，這種獎賞，
就是可以見証到孩子在世界上的成功和成就，
或是看著他們子女，過著快樂的生活，開始他們自已的小家庭，
而感覺很驕傲。
對其他人而言，
或是是可以得到他們孩子的愛和感謝，作為回報。
As for me, the ultimate reward of
fatherhood is summed up in these words:
“ I have no greater joy than to hear that
my children walk in the truth” (3 Jn 4).
4我聽見我的兒女們按真理而行，我的喜樂就沒有比這個大的。
(約三 4)
小頁 markvmax@hotmail.com
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